Posts Tagged ‘you are fail’

I had started writing a rant about the Web Blackout vs SOPA / PIPA bills, but thinking things over the bills are going to fail but not as a result of Blacking out the web. I think the entire idea stands as a ‘this is how shitty things can get’ but as usual it won’t get that shitty because there’s one person at the top paying attention. And it’s not because people were moderately inconvenienced today.

Anyways if you want some lulz from this I highly suggest checking out @herpderpedia and read all the fail that has resulted.

P.S. I’ll probably re-organize my thoughts and write them up for some more shits and giggles when the full fallout from today happens.


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So if you’re not into the news and trendy protests happening, some exasperated people took to the streets of New York, but not in the Gangs of New York style, and decided that the best way to show everyone they mean business was to Occupy Wall Street. Apparently it turns out 2011 is the golden year for Protesting things and you can probably trace it back a bit more to last years G20 Protest / Riot / Insanity, which just happened to take place in Toronto.

None the less the Western World feeling left out because the Arab Spring actually got things done and western hipsters hate to feel left out of the party they didn’t really want to attend have taken it upon themselves to spread the love and mace of Occupy Wall Street to Occupy Toronto this up coming October 15th. Well those hippies can go get bent and best get the hell out of my back yard.

You’d think that because I’m the ‘Disgruntled Urban Artist Guy’ I’d be first in line of those protests, but I am not. You couldn’t be more wrong or farther from the truth of things. Why? Let me produce exhibit A, B and C:

Thanks, the Peace sign totally justifies the fact you just committed a crime and ruined my visual space.

'What day is this happening again?' Idiot...


Awesome, thanks random asshole for defacing the park I enjoy walking through. Seriously, the park is notorious for booze drinking bums, homeless bench sleepers, hippies, hipsters and insane shit, but this is the first time in two plus years I can recount any form of graffiti with malicious intent. All this does something far worse for the movement.

This crap has been in the park for a couple of days, but the one in the first photo has been up since the occupation plans were announced. About a day later, someone taped a letter below it expressing how pissed she was about the damage done to the park she loves and refuses to participate in the protest. It’s a shame someone took it down.

The point being is that if you are seriously planning to participate, you have to understand you’re participating along side the asshole(s) who did this handy work; that you’re part of a group that has people who just are interesting in continuing to cause trouble. I understand it’s extremely hard to keep people focused on a message and weed out anyone who intends to use the event selfishly, but it clearly has happened before the event got rolling.

“Don’t let one bad apple ruin the barrel”. Really? How do you know there’s just one bad apple? What if they’re all shitty apples? Clearly the quality control is not what it should be and from others perspectives everything is already not worth it. Oh you’re partnered with AnonOps? The very same assholes who thought it was fun to bring down PSN for a month and precipitate the hacking of a significant number of credit cards. That AnonOps? Oh right it was another group of hackers, or so you say, but since you’re all Anon, you can’t really prove that at all. Good luck being Anon when the nice law enforcer on the seven-foot horse rolls up and starts laying down his baton up on you.

This all said however, I will be near incident site 0 with camera in hand to basically report for OhInternet because there’s lulz to be had. If you’re concerned about my safety, be assured I usually don’t have ID, my uncle is a cop and I plan to sport a bullet proof helmet and some bitching shades. I’ll be fine and I’m doing it for the lulz.

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There’s a bit of a conflict on this Hate Monday. I mean I have to say I hate about 99.5% of all tumblr. sites I come across and on a whole I find the idea of tumblr. repulsive and irritating. FYI for those who don’t know what tumblr. is:

Tumblr, sometimes styled as tumblr., is a microblogging platform that allows users to post text, images, videos, links, quotes and audio to their tumblelog, a short-form blog. Users can follow other users, or choose to make their tumblelog private. The service emphasizes ease of use.


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Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last few months, the internet has been experiencing a sever rash of hacking incidents. That’s not to say that the internet isn’t being hacked or breached in some capacity everyday somewhere for some reason, but this is beginning to be come excessive. And if anyone hates something in excess it’s the government.

Now this is could be something where there actually isn’t more hacks being done, but a case where they’re being reported with more frequency due to the high-profile targets being hit. Yet either way, it’s still doesn’t help when the hacking groups step up their game and actively announce their intentions, have a live twitter feed, post press releases about their activities as well as video updates and shit. You know who else sort of does that shit? Terrorist groups.

Congrats Anon, LulzSec, Anti-Sec, ect. Your efforts only seek to fuck over the better (and good) hackers, petty hackers and will force many governments hands on the following:

  • Heavier Internet security Laws
  • A form of Digital Terrorism legislation with guidelines for prosecution
  • Erosion of Net Neutrality
  • Increased internet monitoring
  • Decreased freedoms an liberties on the internet (A China like internet in the West)
  • Mass suspicion

Congrats dip-shits. You are single-handedly ruining the internet of tomorrow with shitty pranks today. You’re dumb ass activities act as a justification of bills like C-51 in Canada which is this massive Crime bill and legislation that had little provisions in it which outline things like Internet Service providers obligation to store all the e-mails people send out for the sole purpose of the government using them for investigations and accessing them without a warrant. Awesome. Welcome back 1984.

Realistically, this shit needs to stop. It’s not as if you’re fighting for any great cause. And given that this is the internet, anyone and everyone typically just makes claims they are someone else anonymously so it’s a fair call to say that when the next big hack has some serious implications and does a lot of damage, all done in your hacking groups name, have fun like Anon did trying to disprove it was your people who dun fucked up.

Hacking can be a good form of getting some internet awareness out there on the net to important issues or things which are factually wrong, but the levels it’s being taken to for the past few months is more of an indication that this is all being done without considerations for the ramifications or consideration for the consequences or the future of things to come. Stop being narrow sighted. Stop ruining the internet for everyone.

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So I figured if I was going to be hating on things on a regular Monday basis, I might as well make some effort to justify my actions and not just be a boring old hater. A lot of people hate because they find it fun and their bored. Some hate to make someone feel miserable and awful on the inside. Some hate because that’s all they know. I’m going to hate because I want to see some change in people.

There’s a lot of apathy that happens in society and it’s something I’ve talked about in the past here and to people I know. Everyone carries a ‘I don’t really care’ attitude and that’s bullshit. It’s ignorant to live a life where you have to wait until something happens to you before you give a shit (see the UBB internet problems, last Federal Election in Canada). I want to be a tool for change and I’m not going to wait around and take the passive path to change. I want to shove my opinion in your face and prove how much of a dumb ass you are, or how stupid that idea is or why you’re wrong and doing it wrong.

I’m far from the first to be doing this. If you asked me who inspires me to take on this silly crusade of social change I would have to point to a gent who’s a world-class hater; The Great Maddox.

Maddox is the king of hatin’ and I don’t want to challenge that crown or step on his toes. What I take from him is the don’ give a shit attitude and say what I feel and think without being inhibited by how people are going to react. No one should feel they have to be self censured about speaking their minds. And I welcome people to disagree with me about what I’m saying. If you have a problem or if you feel I am wrong, leave a comment and say so. Nothing changes without discussion. Perhaps there’s something I didn’t consider or something you could have been misinformed on.

Let me cast the first stone and say I hate bloggers who are too god damn lazy to get writing and listen to the little hater with in them. Don’t be stupid, stupid and remember that you can only make hater-aid when you start adding hate. Else you have shitty water and who wants shitty water?

Hate on peeps, it’s Monday.

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Some weeks ago a friend was watching retro music videos and I just happened to have to suffer through it. To make it worse she started playing videos ft. Timbaland, whom I know only as the musical douche bag who likes to sample more tracks than people at a grocery store sampling booth. What I didn’t know is how shitty of a performer he is in music videos and a worse singer. So for this week, I devote towards my eternal dislike to ft. Timbaland, a man not cool enough to do enough of his own stuff.

Nelly Furtado – Promiscuous ft. Timbaland

This is an example of a bad video, what never to do for a music video. First off, the need to do the whole rainbow/ mono-chromatic thing, not needed in the least. I mean it can be well done, but the director didn’t know how to roll with it nicely. What compounds this fact more is that someone thought it would be nice to fast cut to the beat, the 2/4 beat meaning you get to see a scene for about a max of three seconds before onto the next seizure rainbow colour. Thanks. And to give this a little more street / hip-hop creed we gotta have JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE do something dumb. Also that’s both the shittiest club, and some of the worst music video chemistry you’ll see in a video.

The Pussycat Dolls – Wait A Minute ft. Timbaland

Must be something about Timbaland that causes these videos to be more jumpy and less focused than kids with ADD/ADHD who snort pixie sticks. Again it’s hard to know what’s going on because every few minutes the scene is jumping to something else. Is he being followed, is he following someone. Most importantly is this a music video for a song or a song promoting a shitty Samsung mp3 player? (Shit that’s cool doesn’t need promo like this) Such a hard video to follow due again to all the fast cuts. How anyone watched this without puking is beyond me.

Keri Hilson – Return The Favor ft. Timbaland

Did you see what they did there? Instead of pulling the 3 second fast cuts they now do the zoom and pan over and over again. And as a bonus they’re now using the pixelation feature. Good to see that video creativity and direction are moving on, although it’s in the wrong direction. I’m beginning to suspect ft. Timbaland has a hand to play in this bullshit, and his damn trademark popping eyes is shoved in here again. All and all typical pop bullshit crap that creates nothing more than an irritating and forgettable music video.

Flo Rida – Elevator ft. Timbaland

How do you know Timbaland is ft. or appearing in your music video? You have almost as many fast cuts as Requiem for a Dream. Yeah yet another ADD music video with out boy ft. Timbaland. And yet again like all these music videos I’m fucking confused about what I’m supposed to be seeing. This one out of them all sort of makes sense since Flo’s in an elevator singing about an elevator, but that’s not the best song. There’s also way too much shaking going on in the video to. I miss old music videos already. Ft. Timbaland, you ruin everything.

Except Acidjazzed Evening. (as much as you try)

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This phenomenon has been bothering me for a very long time and it’s been the one You are Fail that I’ve been struggling to express myself on properly and in full. First off, what’s wrong with wearing regular pants? I think someone forgot to tell me that woman basically hate pants that are socially normal. Why do men miss this memo? Further more it seems, showing off your vag / camel-toe is totally in.

I really don’t have problems with tights on women (well aside from them being as pants replacements and when they’re too small and the woman just happens to stretch the fuck out of them), but it’s moved from being something worn under a skirt / dress / clothing accent to being a sign that women are becoming lazy in their dress. I would like to blame celebrities for this, but it really comes down to society being to blame (just like the mass acceptance of Transformers 2. COME ON PEOPLE!!!) What is it that happened to people in life to just accept that tights as pants are a proper way to exhibit yourself in public?

I find it odd that about a decade ago spandex was a fad where people were actively shamed for over exposure of their less flattering bulbous parts and that now it’s herald as being as the way women are expected in a way to dress?

But perhaps I’m being overly simplistic about this. From other observations of female attire of late, I find that there’s extremes in dress ranging from big ass Uggs in winter and summer to extremely skinny tight jeans to skirts and shorts where their asses are falling out. Like come on ladies, this is what you spent years combating equality rights only to allow yourself to deliberately degraded to the status of TNA (Tit’s ‘n ass).

I’m entirely unsure. I can’t see the fun in parading around like a douchbag and three dollar whore, but there are other, better, less degrading ways to dress and actually look like you put more effort into it. Perhaps I don’t have much of a right to comment on given that I’ve been wearing the same and similar clothing for the last 8 years (oh yeah, rockin’ the loose fitting jeans and basic grey t-shirt), but I do have a right to not want some random girls vag to be shoved into my face when I walk down the street, or have to shudder as someone bends over and stretches their tights to the limit.

Really, I can’t under stand this female desire to not only dress down to nothing while at the same time scream bloody murder when negative attention is drawn towards their camel-toe because their oozing sexual attention. I don’t understand why women want to cloth themselves in the most skintight clothing imagined? It’s bordering on some very disturbing fetishes (constriction, voyeurism, exhibitionism…)

It’s all non-sense and it needs to pass and honestly when it does, I’m going to make sure it doesn’t come back by rubbing it in face of everyone who actively participated and fully endorsed the practice.

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